Quote:
Somehow, while doing whatever it is you do, all of you have ended up in Ireland. You each independently saw a leprechaun at the end of a rainbow with a pot of gold, a pot of incredibly sctrong alcohol, a pot of food and another pot of gold. As you each independently tried to sneak up on the leprechaun, you had gotten caught in faerie circles. You are all teleported to the same location where the leprechaun tells you this:
"So, thou desireth such things! Then thou must giveth me back such things totalling one million gold in value! If thou doth stray from each other, thou shalt surely die of this spell in a week! If thou wouldst raise a hand against thy party member, so shall this spell raise a hand against thee!"
With that, the leprechaun disappears and you are left by the edge of a town.
Unfortunately, they were not very good at thinking of get-rich schemes, much less get-rich-quick schemes. They tried to:
- Capture a British ship while its soldiers were busy fighting against Irish peasants and disguise themselves as English soldiers, hoping that they could get paid a regular salary. They made their way to London and managed to convince the Queen that they had somehow fought the entire battle of Dublin by themselves, so the royal wizard just had to investigate these claims using a crystal ball. They managed to break the crystal ball before the wizard could cast his scrying spells, do some slave labor for the wizard, set the wizard's tower on fire while he was asleep, and sneak out of London using stolen horses.
- Hike all the way across France while avoiding Orc villages and Orc & Goblin mercenaries as well as avoiding the hotspots of the 100 years war. They still ended up killing an Orc farmer and making off with his donkeys.
- Hitch a ride on a ship headed for Italy and fight off a Troglodyte attack. They survived mainly because the Troglodytes kept on rolling horribly and the Rogue just barely managed to stay in hiding for most of the time. Eventually, they made it to Italy where they were finally able to find some healing potions for sale.
- Infiltrate the Vatican City where they tried to poison one of the wells. The monk swiftly murdered the guy guarding the well by giving him a nice Quivering Palm and them stomping him to death while he was down. They then threw both the guard's body and all of the poison they could afford into the well, but they didn't seem to care that in the meantime, a huge group of women were staring at them. They managed to sneak into an inn and disguise themselves so that they would not resemble the wanted posters that were being put up all over the city - and believe me, this took a lot of lucky rolls. To cover their tracks, they tried setting most of the city on fire.
- Narrowly escape from the Holy See where they were brought in for questioning by the Pope. The PCs were this close to being annihilated by an Implosion spell at their low level, but they rolled very luckily. They even managed to escape from some catacombs where a few Inquisitors were planning to torture them rather painfully for what they had done.
- Lead a pack of zombies from a graveyard to a village in the hopes that the zombies would take care of the villagers, letting them grab everything that wasn't bolted down. Unfortunately for them, this only resulted in the quantity of zombies being doubled. By the time they managed to snipe off all the zombies, all the gold and valuables were contaminated by thick zombie gunk, so their efforts were useless.
We decided to stop the campaign there because, at the rate they were going, they were destined to be killed in horrible ways. Also, they were of a high enough level to attract the kinds of monsters that you don't want to meet without a spellcaster in your party. I'm starting to think that if perhaps the players had been a little more intelligent and resourceful, we might have had the first successfully-run evil campaign ever, but they were sadly a bit too thick for their own good.
