Awesome awful movies list

nwelte1 · Post by **nwelte1** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 3:10 am

I know it is not a fantasy movie but the thread did not say it was limited to fantasy, but I think BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA should be to the list.

"Would you just stop rubbing your body up against mine, because I can't concentrate when you do that. " - Jack Burton

Oh and add ARMY OF DARKNESS.

"First you want to kill me. Now you want to kiss me. Go Blow." - Ash

"Give me some sugar baby."

seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 3:18 am

I concur on Big Trouble in Little China, and it sort of goes with They Live because both are John Carpenter films and were sort of during his mid-80s "pulp" phase.

Might argue against Army of Darkness or any of the Evil Dead movies because Raimi was deliberately TRYING to be campy bad, but then that would exempt the above as well....

Oh, and I agree on Conan II.... The Destroyer was bad in all aspects except for looking at Olivia D'Abo (as long as you ignored her acting).

Wilt Chamberlain... whew, master thespian there lol....
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TheNewGuy · Post by **TheNewGuy** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 3:25 am

nwelte1 wrote:
I know it is not a fantasy movie but the thread did not say it was limited to fantasy, but I think BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA should be to the list.

"Would you just stop rubbing your body up against mine, because I can't concentrate when you do that. " - Jack Burton

Oh and add ARMY OF DARKNESS.

"First you want to kill me. Now you want to kiss me. Go Blow." - Ash

"Give me some sugar baby."

I LOVE "Big Trouble In Little China" ("I never drive faster than I can see"), and "Army of Darkness" is, well, it's "Army of Darkness"!!!
But I didn't mention these because the thread seemed to be calling for favorite movies which are actually kind of flawed, but you love them anyway.

Myself, I would count both BTILC and AOD as classics, not flawed gems. To me, anyway, they're the real steel deal -- good movies.

Now, for another bad movie I liked anyway, I'm ashamed to admit I still liked "Predator 2" for some unknown reason.

Aliens 3 through the current, I can barely stomach. With the last two Aliens versus Predator films, the worst of the lot. To me, they aren't "flawed gems" or "bad-but-fun" movies. They're just bad-bad-bad.

But hey, these are only my opinions. Your mileage may vary, and that's cool.

Thanks for posting nwelte!

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dachda · Post by **dachda** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 5:32 am

Let's not forget that 1986 classic:

Howard the Duck.

Where a sarcastic humanoid duck is pulled from his homeworld to Earth where he must stop an alien invader.

Leah Thompson stared as Howard's love interest . . . human-duck relationships weird.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091225/

TheNewGuy · Post by **TheNewGuy** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 6:32 am

dachda wrote:
Let's not forget that 1986 classic:

Howard the Duck.

Can't we at least try to forget it, dachda? Lord knows, I do try!
Seriously, though, I've never been able to sit through more than ten minutes of that film ... and I was a fan of the original comic book, for the most part.

Even the presence of Leah Thompson -- who I always found crush-worthy -- couldn't make me stay.

Here's a another, more recent, bad movie that I did like, in spite of myself, John Carpenter's The Ghosts of Mars. Loved the premise; it just didn't seem to really go anywhere, when all was said and done. Disappointing, that.

Of course, I'm no judge. I'm the only guy on the planet, it seems, who doesn't like the Daniel Craig James Bond ...

The movies have great style, stunts, and effects but Daniel Craig in the role of "Sean Wannabe" just really put me off. No disrespect to Craig, either, but the "hard tough man" shtik as written for the screen never convinced me.

I'd better go now -- I expect people are going to start flaming me big-time after what I just wrote ...
TheNewGuy
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Jonathan of White Haven · Thu Apr 17, 2008 5:27 pm

Traveller wrote:
And I found D&D: Wrath of the Elemental God at Wal-Mart, though its appearance was brief. It wasn't there the following month.

For truly bad, watch Gor and Outlaw of Gor. Both were absolutely craptacular, blithely ignoring everything that made the source material what it is, except for the writing.

Ooh! Where can I get either of these, um, "fine" films? Our group gets together on New Year's Eve and one of the activities (aside from consuming mass quantities of food and drink) is doing "Bad Cinema". This tradition started when one of our members (sadly, now deceased) brought "Necronomicon" as the evening's entertainment. We now rotate the responsibility for supplying a bad movie for the party. And we've truly gone downhill from there.
Though I brought "Dungeons & Dragons" last time around, the top two craptastic films viewed have been "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls" and "Ishtar", though one of my personal favorites was "Dolomite", a late-'70's "blacksploitation" product. It was so bad that we refused to finish watching it. Brrrr.
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Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 5:29 pm

Oh man, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls was croizy!
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nwelte1 · Post by **nwelte1** » Fri Apr 18, 2008 12:17 am

if you want to watch an awful movie... without any awesomeness watch Death to the Supermodels.... My wife bought thinking would be funny...... My eyes are still recovering as upon watching the film I tried to claw them out.

dkeester · Post by **dkeester** » Fri Apr 18, 2008 4:23 am

"You know what Jack Burton says at a time like this?"

"Who?"

...

Let's add Hudson Hawk to the list of really good bad movies.

Geleg · Post by **Geleg** » Fri Apr 18, 2008 11:56 am

guys, guys, guys ... how can you forget this recent 'classic'?
Stan Lee's HARPIES ('starring' Stephen Baldwin)

tag line: "Some security guards sleep on the job. This one fights wizards and monsters."

link: http://www.scifi.com/harpies/

Another sci-fi classic. I flicked by and became spellbound by the train wreck that ensued.
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cuchulainkevin · Post by **cuchulainkevin** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 8:28 pm

[quote="seskis281"]Yep - sorry, just didn't catch the earlier Beastmaster pop....

So many crowning moments, but the question is who gives the worse performance, Tanya Roberts (who's a bad actress all around) or Rip Torn (who's actually a good actor)

quote]

During the sacrifice scene there's a close up of Rip Torn. It looks like he's having a bowe movement .
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cuchulainkevin · Post by **cuchulainkevin** » Sat Apr 19, 2008 8:32 pm

the Marlon Brando/Val Kilmer version od The Isle of Dr Moreau.

A 350 pound Brando with white makup mumbling for two hours with a dwarven-mutant sidekick.

Just plain bizarre.
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mordrene · Post by **mordrene** » Sun Apr 20, 2008 10:34 pm

OK if we are going to talk awesome bad movies, "Hell Comes to Frogtown." hands down roddy piper's best movie, forget boddyslam and they live. If you havent seen this.its a must awefully bad see. Im talking toxiic avenger awesome.

now the worst movie i have ever seen was a western i caught my mom watching while I was home during a college break called "women go west." It was about some mail order brides going to gold miners in california during the gold rush. one line i remember was a scene when the women arrived and the guy who brought them was explaining to the men the women needed time to freshen up. He stated, "Listen men, these women had it rough. Jim, I know you were in the donner party and you had it rough, but not as rough as these women." At that point I snap and ask my mom did the women resort to canabalism to get across the west? bad movie

bighara · Post by **bighara** » Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:40 am

TheNewGuy wrote:
I LOVE "Big Trouble In Little China" ("I never drive faster than I can see"), and "Army of Darkness"

TheNewGuy

BTLC = One of the greatest adventure films EVAR. Gaming-wise, it's nearly the perfect comic CoC template.

Jyrdan Fairblade · Post by **Jyrdan Fairblade** » Wed Apr 30, 2008 3:18 pm

Z-man rules!

I can't believe the Deathstalker series hasn't come up yet - The second even features John Lazar (Z-man from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls) as the main villain.

Matthew wrote:
Oh man, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls was croizy!

Indigo Rose · Post by **Indigo Rose** » Wed Apr 30, 2008 9:30 pm

Sieg and I absolutely love Deathstalker II, but it was not even remotely taking itself seriously...

Still, in what other fantasy film can you hear "Give that lady a cigar"? And the wrestling ring out in the middle of the forest was simply fantastic!
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Gleemax Jr · Post by **Gleemax Jr** » Wed Apr 30, 2008 9:41 pm

i think return to oz is a spectacular awful awesome movie.
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concobar · Post by **concobar** » Wed Apr 30, 2008 11:50 pm

Spacehunter: Adventures in Forbidden Zone..

I really liked this movie.. Another good on was Light Years.

tylermo · Post by **tylermo** » Thu May 01, 2008 8:23 pm

Spacehunter is one of the greats. Almost borders on good movie category. I haven't read the first three pages of this thread, but 1980's Flash Gordon, and Cannonball Run simply must be on the list. Those movies entertained me at 9-10 years old in the theater, and they continue to do so in 2008.

tylermo · Post by **tylermo** » Thu May 01, 2008 8:37 pm

I just finished looking at the list, and I can't believe Flash and Cannonball Run weren't included until I weighed in. How about Roger Corman's(that could be almost any of his films) Battle Beyond the Stars. Remember how it was supposed to be The Magnificent Seven meets Star Wars. Yes, you remember this one. Starring Richard "JOhn Boy Walton" Thomas, George Peppard(pre-A-team), Sybil Danning, Robert Vaughn, etc. The real stars were behind the scenes, however. Gayle Ann Herd worked on Battle. She later produced both Terminator films, as I recall. Also some other Terminator/Titanic guy was doing art direction, effects, etc. None other than James Cameron. And, the soundtrack was provided by the very talented James Horner. Much of Battle's soundtrack was lifted for use in Star Trek II(a much better sci-fi movie) the following year. Raise a glass to the greatness of Battle Beyond the Stars. I was thrilled when it was released to DVD. And yes, it's the film with the boob ship that talks. hehe

cinderblock · Post by **cinderblock** » Sat May 10, 2008 1:38 am

Barbarian Queen---something like 17 Penthouse pets trying to act
AWESOME

Still i think its the only film I've seen where skeletons float in a tub of acid.

Oh yeah,

Blademaster---- they use the same cave 14-20 times for different scenes and the big monster is a sock puppet spider!!
Rock

seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Sat May 10, 2008 11:54 am

tylermo wrote:
I just finished looking at the list, and I can't believe Flash and Cannonball Run weren't included until I weighed in. How about Roger Corman's(that could be almost any of his films) Battle Beyond the Stars. Remember how it was supposed to be The Magnificent Seven meets Star Wars. Yes, you remember this one. Starring Richard "JOhn Boy Walton" Thomas, George Peppard(pre-A-team), Sybil Danning, Robert Vaughn, etc. The real stars were behind the scenes, however. Gayle Ann Herd worked on Battle. She later produced both Terminator films, as I recall. Also some other Terminator/Titanic guy was doing art direction, effects, etc. None other than James Cameron. And, the soundtrack was provided by the very talented James Horner. Much of Battle's soundtrack was lifted for use in Star Trek II(a much better sci-fi movie) the following year. Raise a glass to the greatness of Battle Beyond the Stars. I was thrilled when it was released to DVD. And yes, it's the film with the boob ship that talks. hehe

I saw it in the theatre, believe it or not... and the amazing thing is how often corman later reused all the fx shots for multiple other low-budget sci-fis.... of course they were so bad I forgot the titles even.

And thanks for remembering: Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone
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tylermo · Post by **tylermo** » Mon May 12, 2008 3:31 pm

One of the movies in which Corman re-used some effects, or at least the infamous "boob" ship was Space Raiders. I'm not sure if the movie, Metal Storm: The Destruction of Jared Syn, was one of his or not. I believe it was a 3-D movie. Can't remember if I saw Battle Beyond the Stars in the theater. Definately on tv back in the day, but I did see Spacehunter at the theater. Seems like only one or two effects sort of worked in 3-D. Also, saw Jaws 3-D back in the day, but let's not talk about that. Uuggh. Probably not as bad as Jaws: The Revenge. Did I even see that one all the way through? Maybe not. I'm sure Michael Cain remembers it fondly. hehe

Troll Lord · Post by **Troll Lord** » Tue May 13, 2008 3:11 am

Dark Star.

You have to go get this movie. One of the best worst space adventure movies of all time. Its basically about some astronauts...actually just some hippies...whose job is to fly around the galaxy and blow up unstable planets. There are hilarious sequences with one of the nauts who keeps a diary, running out of toilet paper, fighting an alien that is actually a beach ball and a bomb that suddenly becomes self aware and the Captain has a philosophical debate with it:
Original Smart Bomb

Great stuff!! John Carpenter and Dan O'Bannon wrote and directed I believe, he went on to co-write Aliens.
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Tadhg · Post by **Tadhg** » Wed May 21, 2008 12:11 am

I cast a vote for Waterworld.

Its really a potentially awesome movie that unfortunately has some of the worst acting Ive ever seen from Kevin Costner or any other actor. And hes generally a very good actor and has done some real good work.

But in this movie, he just sucks. And it really bugs ya, because you think there might be some potential for his character to stop being a p*i*k and he doesnt even at the end. I hated him every bit as much as the end as I did from the beginning.

The other actors in the movie completely shined and made Costner and his character look even worse.

In my mind, Im going to rewrite this, so the women slits the mariners throat and cuts off his pecker.

What the friggin hell was Costner thinking when he did this character?

Ive watched this movie a few times, but I tried the other night and just had to stop it ~ as it got so annoying I couldnt stand it.

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Titania Lefey · Post by **Titania Lefey** » Wed May 21, 2008 6:54 pm

! second the vote for water world. I couldn't stand that movie when I was 10, still can't stand it now. I managed to watch it a few months ago just to make sure my memory of it wasn't flawed, and I wasn't dissing a movie that was actually pretty good. Alas, my younger self was right, Like Rhu said, good idea, bad execution. Not even the "OMG that was so bad! lol" execution.

for awesome bad movies, I say that the Evil dead series is my favorite.

Scenes:

the crawling hand in Evil dead 1 (I think... that or it was 2.... I'll have to watch again to be sure )

The dancing corpse in ED2

Retrieving the book of darkness in AoD

Storming the castle in AoD, the undead lord just going "oooh! aah! thats gotta hurt!"

Truthfully It is hard to recall them all.

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huds0n · Post by **huds0n** » Wed May 21, 2008 7:18 pm

Dark Star gets another vote also. I actually have it on DVD.

Plus may i add Battle Beyond the Stars and Galaxina to the so bad, they're good list.
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serleran · Post by **serleran** » Fri May 23, 2008 2:35 pm

If I didn't mention it again (and even if I did) it is worth saying:

Microwave Massacre.

Oh, and Jesus Christ: Vampire Killer.

cinderblock · Post by **cinderblock** » Sun May 25, 2008 12:13 am

Redneck Zombies!!!

seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Sun May 25, 2008 12:38 am

The Swamp Thing

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