After Winter's Dark Impressions, or PLEASE use a proofreader

[gambler1650]

Ok, so I had asked in another thread whether the Umbrage Saga Box set had less proofreading type issues (typos, inconsistent names, etc) than "Assault on Blacktooth Ridge" first edition. Most of the answers seemed to indicate that these issues are pretty prevalent in Troll Lord Games products. Now, I like the Core Rulebook quite a bit, and generally think it's pretty well edited, so I still held out hope.

And then I got "After Winter's Dark" today and I gave it a quick scan. First the positives because there are quite a few.

I love the folio format. Having something to put my own notes if I use the setting, charts, copies of PCs, etc, is a great idea. The artwork is very nice. In general I like the look of Troll Lord products. They're usually colorful, well illustrated, and not too busy. I really like the look of the maps. And if what I've read about the setting holds up to expectations, it should sit right up there with Greyhawk and Forgotten Realms for me.

So I flipped open the first book and read the first two sentences (which are also on the back of the folio).

"The world of Aihrde spins upon an earth-like axis of ancient civilizations where good and evil have struggled for countless years. It is a world that bares the markings of its past; ..."

So... the axis is made up of ancient civilizations? And this makes it earth-like? Because that's what the first sentence says.

And it's a world that makes sure to offer up the markings of its past for all to see? Because that's the meaning of 'bare' as opposed to 'bear' which is, I think, what was meant.

It also misspells the title of the product, calling it "After Winter Dark", later in the blurb, and the punctuation is generally poor.

Seriously, Troll Lord Games has got to invest in some proofreaders. Offer a free copy to the first three people willing to proofread new products who actually appear to have read the whole thing. Or something. I mean, I'm assuming that "After Winter's Dark" is supposed to be a flagship product for the Castles & Crusades line, but if I'd seen the back first, I doubt I would have bought it.

Believe me, I know that editing sucks. I write scientific papers. And there are two truisms... When I finish a paper, I'm sick of looking at it and don't do a good job of going back over it and editing it myself. And even if I do edit it myself, my co-authors or people I ask to proof read it always find far more mistakes than I think could possibly be there. I'm not trying to be overly negative as I really do like the overall system and the ideas that come out of Troll Lord Games, and I'm not going to post these impressions anywhere else because I'm hoping they come off as constructive comments.

[Sir Ironside]

You'll be happy to note that they now have a full time editor.

[REHowardfanatic]

The axis quote seems merely to be a metaphor. 'Bares' looks very much like a spelling error.
I noticed that the PHB had lots of confusion in places with the possessive and plural forms. Alas, that has become teh demon of modern grammar.
I'd just like to state, and I'm sure many fans would volunteer as well, that if a proofreader is needed, I'll do it.

[Sir Ironside]

So I flipped open the first book and read the first two sentences (which are also on the back of the folio).

"The world of Aihrde spins upon an earth-like axis of ancient civilizations where good and evil have struggled for countless years. It is a world that bares the markings of its past; ..."

And it's a world that makes sure to offer up the markings of its past for all to see? Because that's the meaning of 'bare' as opposed to 'bear' which is, I think, what was meant.

I think you're missing a definition.

Bare: Open to view; unconcealed; undisguised.

"The world of Aihrde spins upon an earth-like axis of ancient civilizations, where good and evil have struggled for countless years. It is a world that bares the markings of its past; ..."

So... the axis is made up of ancient civilizations? And this makes it earth-like? Because that's what the first sentence says.

Axis: (Adjective) Earth-like

Maybe, "The world of Aihrde spins upon an earth-like axis, of ancient civilizations, where good and evil have struggled for countless years. It is a world that bares the markings of its past; ..." would be better and less confusing.

[Traveller]

Now, I like the Core Rulebook quite a bit, and generally think it's pretty well edited, so I still held out hope.

The main reason the PHB is so well edited is because some of us have spent the last six years poring through each and every printing of the PHB looking for stuff like this. We obviously can't catch every single error, but the PHB you have in your possession is a far different beast from the 1st printing mostly because of people like you. People who don't accept mistakes and bring attention to them so they can be corrected in a later printing.

Even though the Trolls have a full-time editor, you still can help out if you are so inclined, by finding what you believe are gaffes and emailing them to the Trolls.

[zarathustra]

Earth like axis is a tilt of 27 degrees to the sun, which is the only reason we have changing seasons. Without the tilted axis there would be no seasons on Earh, or Airdhe and therefore no Winters Dark.

[AGNKim]

I find them endearing.

[Tadhg]

I find them endearing.

The books or the Trolls??

[Lurker]

I find them endearing.

The books or the Trolls??

That depends on if they are serving something stronger than Dr. Pepper

[Just Jeff]

Gambler, whatever you do, don't read the Quick Start rules.