Awesome awful movies list

slimykuotoan · Post by **slimykuotoan** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:35 pm

Here we go...

seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:41 pm

The Ice Pirates!!!
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Skywalker · Post by **Skywalker** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:49 pm

Dungeons and Dragons: The Elemental Might.

Where the 1st D&D movie was awful, the second was definitely awesome awful.

Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:52 pm

Probably a few off this list:
Hawk the Slayer (1980)
Dragon Slayer (1981)
Conan the Barbarian (1982)
Beast Master (1982)
The Sword and the Sorcerer (1982)
Krull (1983)
Conan the Destroyer (1984)
Ladyhawk (1985)
Legend (1985)
Red Sonja (1985)
Willow (1988)
Beast Master: Through the Portal of Time (1991)
Beast Master: The Eye of Braxus (1996)
Dragon Heart (1996)
Kull the Conqueror (1997)
Dragon Heart: A New Beginning (2000)
Dungeons & Dragons (2000)
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
The Scorpion King (2002)
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
Ring of the Nibelungs (2004)
Earthsea (2005)
Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God (2006)
Eragon (2006)
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Skywalker · Post by **Skywalker** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:01 pm

Matthew wrote:
Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God (2006)

My copy of this has the subtitle - Elemental Might

Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:09 pm

Yeah, it was released under a couple of different titles for some reason (they were orginally working titles). Unlike the first film, I have never seen this one available in any big stores; I just happened to catch it on ITV4.

Looks like it did very poor business: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0406728/business
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Deogolf · Post by **Deogolf** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:12 pm

Matthew wrote:
Probably a few off this list:
Hawk the Slayer (1980)
Dragon Slayer (1981)
Conan the Barbarian (1982)
Beast Master (1982)
The Sword and the Sorcerer (1982)
Krull (1983)
Conan the Destroyer (1984)
Ladyhawk (1985)
Legend (1985)
Red Sonja (1985)
Willow (1988)
Beast Master: Through the Portal of Time (1991)
Beast Master: The Eye of Braxus (1996)
Dragon Heart (1996)
Kull the Conqueror (1997)
Dragon Heart: A New Beginning (2000)
Dungeons & Dragons (2000)
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
The Scorpion King (2002)
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
Ring of the Nibelungs (2004)
Earthsea (2005)
Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God (2006)
Eragon (2006)

Is there any movie you do like??
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Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:21 pm

Hey, I didn't say I didn't like them... I just admit that next to something like Marlon Brando's Julius Caesar these films are craptastic (some less so than others).
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Lord Falcon MacGreggor · Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:25 pm

It appears to me that he just doesn't like any movies that may have a D&D era backdrop.
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Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:27 pm

Now if that were true, I doubt I would have gone to the trouble of watching them all, and then putting them in a list to remember them; I just wouldn't watch any fantasy films.
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Treebore · Post by **Treebore** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:30 pm

I like most of the movies on that list. I even love 3 or 4 of them.
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Traveller · Post by **Traveller** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:49 pm

And I found D&D: Wrath of the Elemental God at Wal-Mart, though its appearance was brief. It wasn't there the following month.

For truly bad, watch Gor and Outlaw of Gor. Both were absolutely craptacular, blithely ignoring everything that made the source material what it is, except for the writing.
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seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:57 pm

Hrmm... I have trouble putting LOTR series under this particular topic -- those Oscars and general critical response tends to back up my own belief they were outstanding.... AFI just added them to top 100 of the last 100 years.

I also disagree on Ladyhawk, while not an Oscar-caliber it was a sold Richard Donner fantasy/romance/actioner.

Now, here's two I'd add to this:
Megaforce
Beastmaster

Two truly awful films that I still love to watch when they occasionally come on cable.

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Matthew · Post by **Matthew** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:18 am

Initially I quite liked the LotR films, but the more I watched them (I have seen them about a half dozen times or more), the less I liked them. I currently rate them technically higher than most of the other films listed above, but below Conan the Barbarian, which I consider to be the best fantasy film available.

One of the things I really dislike about the LotR films, and have done since the beginning, is the soundtrack. I think it's just awful (and I have it on CD). The Conan soundtrack, by contrast, is possibly the most powerful element of the movie (it's certainly not the acting, though there are a fair number of exceptions). Obviously, though, opinions vary.
Ladyhawk was pretty good for its day, as I recall. I think I would rate it as about as good a Dragon Slayer, which would put it on par with something like Red Sonja or Conan the Destroyer. I would probably have to watch it again.
Beast Master is, of course, already up there on that list. Cows, pregnant women and ferrets...
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jman5000 · Post by **jman5000** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:20 am

I thought:

Starship troopers fits the awesome awful movie title pretty well.

cheers,

J.

Harry Joy · Post by **Harry Joy** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:47 am

Saturday night is game night, but I'm hoping someone might be willin' to tape this for me...

seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:51 am

Yep - sorry, just didn't catch the earlier Beastmaster pop....

"I am Dar, of the Emerites!!!"

"There are NO more Emerites!"

"I'm the last one..."

So many crowning moments, but the question is who gives the worse performance, Tanya Roberts (who's a bad actress all around) or Rip Torn (who's actually a good actor)

Oh, and here's one we've missed to this point -
Clash of the Titans
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seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:52 am

Harry Joy wrote:
Saturday night is game night, but I'm hoping someone might be willin' to tape this for me...

Oh dear gods in the heavens.....

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rom90125 · Post by **rom90125** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:57 am

How the hell can Ladyhawke and Dragon Slayer be on that list? I didn't think those movies were awful...in fact, I purchased DS on dvd and showed it to my 11-year old son a few weeks ago.
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slimykuotoan · Post by **slimykuotoan** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:01 am

Warbirds looks like a truly awesome, awful time.

Holy cheese...I'd love to see it.

Sweeeet.

serleran · Post by **serleran** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:11 am

No list is complete without Q.

Coleston the Cavalier · Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:22 am

Ishtar

The Fountain

I like really bad scifi and fantasy movies. I think it's some kind of condition.
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rom90125 · Post by **rom90125** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:25 am

Coleston the Cavalier wrote:
Ishtar

The Fountain

I like really bad scifi and fantasy movies. I think it's some kind of condition.

Is The Fountain truly awful or just so esoteric that no one but the director could understand it? It was a beautiful film but I'll be damned if I understood it.
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Skywalker · Post by **Skywalker** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:50 am

rom90125 wrote:
Is The Fountain truly awful or just so esoteric that no one but the director could understand it? It was a beautiful film but I'll be damned if I understood it.

I loved the Fountain. It made a lot of sense to me in terms of emotion and theme, even if the storylines were obscure.

Coleston the Cavalier · Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:51 am

I liked the characters and it was well-made.

I think it was an attempt to get converts to some sort of eastern mysticism.

I felt sick and defiled when I left the theater.

They advertised it as "space traveler" movie.
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TheNewGuy · Post by **TheNewGuy** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:04 am

Not fantasy, but Rutger Hauer's Split Second remains a favorite of mine, even though I know it's not great.

The classic line from that film, "We're gonna need more guns! Big f*cking guns!" still occasionally gets quoted around the game table when things start to go bad for the players ...

Gor, I am thoroughly prejudiced against from the days of the books. I knew too many people peripherally who "read them one-handed" (a-hem) as S&M bondage softcore porn.

Not at all saying the people here are those types of readers, just that I knew too many people incidentally who had disturbing power/dominance-of-women fantasies that they fed with those books.

I tried to read one, to be fair to the series, and couldn't get past the first chapter. If I'd been female, I doubt I'd have made it even that far.

Again, not trying to insult anyone -- just pointing out to prospective new readers that the Gor books are a sword and sorcery series with a very specific agenda informing its themes and ideas,

TheNewGuy
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seskis281 · Post by **seskis281** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:13 am

They Live !!

"I'm here to chew bubble-gum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubble-gum!"

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slimykuotoan · Post by **slimykuotoan** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:17 am

Agreed, They Live is tres awesome!

TheNewGuy · Post by **TheNewGuy** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:23 am

They Live is kind of a "humor detector" movie, don't you think? If someone watches it and doesn't laugh at least once, they may be in need of an emergency "sense of humor" transplant.

I know the movie isn't for everyone (the pacing can get draggy in places) but if you can't find at least one solid laugh in They Live, you may need surgery ...
TheNewGuy
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ThrorII · Post by **ThrorII** » Thu Apr 17, 2008 3:03 am

TheNewGuy wrote:
Not fantasy, but Rutger Hauer's Split Second remains a favorite of mine, even though I know it's not great.

This is one of my all time favorite craptastic movies!!!!!!

I have to admit, Dragonslayer was actually pretty good.

Conan the Barbarian is good in its own way.

Conan the Destroyer is so bad I can't even watch it.