Wonderful New Product

[gideon_thorne]

Announcing the new Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge device, otherwise known as the BOOK.

It's a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use even a child can operate it. Just lift its cover. Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere -- even sitting in an armchair by the fire -- yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.

Here's how it works: each BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. These pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence. By using both sides of each sheet, manufacturers are able to cut costs in half.

Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information directly into your brain. A flick of the finger takes you to the next sheet. The BOOK may be taken up at any time and used by merely opening it. The "Browse" feature allows you to move instantly to any sheet, and move forward or backward as you wish. Most come with an "index" feature, which pinpoints the exact location of any selected information for instant retrieval.

An optional "BOOKmark" accessory allows you to open the BOOK to the exact place you left it in a previous session -- even if the BOOK has been closed. BOOKmarks fit universal design standards; thus a single BOOKmark can be used in BOOKs by various manufacturers.

Portable, durable and affordable, the BOOK is the entertainment wave of the future, and many new titles are expected soon, due to the surge in popularity of its programming tool, the Portable Erasable-Nib Cryptic Intercommunication Language stylus [PENCIL].
_________________
"We'll go out through the kitchen!" Tanis Half-Elven

Peter Bradley

[serleran]

Wow.

At least you didn't mention the Single Tool You'd Likely Use for Something. Those things suck.

[Go0gleplex]

Interesting sidenote...of a comedic if not sad commentary;

The town I lived in prior to relocating to Oregon had a mayor (named Spud...no joke) who made the attempt to close the town library because, to use his own words, "It is of no benefit or use to the community and is simply a waste of money."

frightening. simply frightening.
_________________
The obvious will always trip you up FAR more than the obscure.

Baron Grignak Hammerhand of the Pacifica Provinces-

High Warden of the Castles & Crusades Society

[Pat Payne]

Go0gleplex wrote:
Interesting sidenote...of a comedic if not sad commentary;

The town I lived in prior to relocating to Oregon had a mayor (named Spud...no joke) who made the attempt to close the town library because, to use his own words, "It is of no benefit or use to the community and is simply a waste of money."

frightening. simply frightening.

What town was this...so I can be sure to stay more than 200 miles from it at all times?

[Tadhg]

serleran wrote:
Wow.

At least you didn't mention the Single Tool You'd Likely Use for Something. Those things suck.

He did mention it!
_________________
Count Rhuveinus - Lejendary Keeper of Castle Franqueforte

"Enjoy a 'world' where the fantastic is fact and magic really works!" ~ Gary Gygax

"By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes:" - Macbeth

[Tadhg]

gideon_thorne wrote:
Announcing the new Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge device, otherwise known as the BOOK.

It's a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use even a child can operate it. Just lift its cover. Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere -- even sitting in an armchair by the fire -- yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.

Here's how it works: each BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. These pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence. By using both sides of each sheet, manufacturers are able to cut costs in half.

Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information directly into your brain. A flick of the finger takes you to the next sheet. The BOOK may be taken up at any time and used by merely opening it. The "Browse" feature allows you to move instantly to any sheet, and move forward or backward as you wish. Most come with an "index" feature, which pinpoints the exact location of any selected information for instant retrieval.

An optional "BOOKmark" accessory allows you to open the BOOK to the exact place you left it in a previous session -- even if the BOOK has been closed. BOOKmarks fit universal design standards; thus a single BOOKmark can be used in BOOKs by various manufacturers.

Portable, durable and affordable, the BOOK is the entertainment wave of the future, and many new titles are expected soon, due to the surge in popularity of its programming tool, the Portable Erasable-Nib Cryptic Intercommunication Language stylus [PENCIL].

This is simply astounding. Where can one get a hold of this . . this . BOOK??

_________________
Count Rhuveinus - Lejendary Keeper of Castle Franqueforte

"Enjoy a 'world' where the fantastic is fact and magic really works!" ~ Gary Gygax

"By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes:" - Macbeth

[gideon_thorne]

Rhuvein wrote:
This is simply astounding. Where can one get a hold of this . . this . BOOK??

Obviously not in the aforementioned town...
_________________
"We'll go out through the kitchen!" Tanis Half-Elven

Peter Bradley

[Tadhg]

Will I look cool carrying one of these devices around with me? Or more importantly will they help attract members of the opposite sex??

. . . hoping in Hoboken. 8/8/08

_________________
Count Rhuveinus - Lejendary Keeper of Castle Franqueforte

"Enjoy a 'world' where the fantastic is fact and magic really works!" ~ Gary Gygax

"By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes:" - Macbeth

[Breakdaddy]

Ok then.

[Go0gleplex]

It's original name is BUG. And THAT mayor is long gone now...
_________________
The obvious will always trip you up FAR more than the obscure.

Baron Grignak Hammerhand of the Pacifica Provinces-

High Warden of the Castles & Crusades Society

[Morgrus]

And now for sumthing completely different......spam,spam,spam.
BUT WAIT if you call in the next 20 mins we will throw in a free dust jacket....WOW
_________________
Awww Craap.

[gideon_thorne]

Then of course there is the Motor Operated Understandable Talking Heuristic.

Works better than the Impersonal Nonentity Typing Eclectic Remote Non Empathic Teleconference device any day for conveying meaningful and comprehensable information. ^_^
_________________
"We'll go out through the kitchen!" Tanis Half-Elven

Peter Bradley

[Tadhg]

gideon_thorne wrote:
Works better than the Impersonal Nonentity Typing Eclectic Remote Non Empathic Teleconference device any day for conveying meaningful and comprehensable information. ^_^

Hmmm, methinks the above thingy will be the one I should use to meet wimmens rather than the "Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge" device.

Gut feeling, I guess.

_________________
Count Rhuveinus - Lejendary Keeper of Castle Franqueforte

"Enjoy a 'world' where the fantastic is fact and magic really works!" ~ Gary Gygax

"By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes:" - Macbeth

[Omote]

You know, the tongue-in-cheek commentary points out the fact that books are slowly, but surely dying. I just went to Borders Bookstore yesterday and picked up 2 books on modern military aircraft that retail for $75 each; I paid $10 total. The information on these books is readily available online in free format. It scares me to know that these books are soon to be no more, at least in my opinion.

Are we just living behind the times? Is print dead? We all love books for the most part, but are libraries and books an artifact of the past?

-O
_________________
> Omote's Advanced C&C stuff <
Duke Omote Landwehr, Holy Order of the FPQ ~ Prince of the Castles & Crusades Society

[Go0gleplex]

Books go away...everything is now on electronic format / storage...power fails/ society implodes/ (choice of post apocalyse scenarios)...no longer have functioning power or electronics...unable to access stored information...

civilization takes a 300 year step backwards. (if we're lucky)
_________________
The obvious will always trip you up FAR more than the obscure.

Baron Grignak Hammerhand of the Pacifica Provinces-

High Warden of the Castles & Crusades Society

[Omote]

*** enters the "World Code" ***

-O
_________________
> Omote's Advanced C&C stuff <
Duke Omote Landwehr, Holy Order of the FPQ ~ Prince of the Castles & Crusades Society

[JediOre]

Guys,

As a manager of a college bookstore, I truly think part of the push away from books is by the textbook industry.

If they, the textbook publishers, can raise the price of their books high enough to cripple student's ability to purchase printed books, the industry can introduce one-semester e-books at a "reasonable" price, i.e. $65 or so.

With this new e-book, textbook publishers eliminate binding, printing, and shipping costs. They cut out bookstores and the problem of book returns from stores at the end of each semester. But more importantly, the used book market is destroyed which insures nothing but new book sales.

Also, the bogus reasons used to create new editions of textbooks are now done away with, thus reducing costs even further.

This has little or nothing to do with progress, but solely market control.

I get angry every time I think about the practices of the major textbook publishers.