The Innocence of Youth (Stuff you thought you knew)

Post by **Fiffergrund** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 7:58 pm

I've been reminiscing about some of the misconceptions I had about certain D&D objects, equipment, or creatures back in the early 80s when I started playing. I thought it might be fun if we listed some.

For starters:

- I thought a lucerne hammer was a giant maul like Rexor's in Conan the Barbarian.

- A glaive was, yes, the Glaive from Krull.

- composite bows were actually compound bows.

- When my brother was describing the game and mentioned "mace", I thought he meant a chemical.

- the "light" in Cure Light Wounds was very confusing to me. I knew what the spell did, but didn't know why they were called "Light" wounds when they had nothing to do with "Light". It was only later, when I saw the Expert set and Cure Serious Wounds, that I understood what "Light" meant. With just the Basic set, there was no frame of reference.

Hey, I was young.
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Frost · Post by **Frost** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:03 pm

Thanks to my brother, who taught me how to play, I thought a "scimitar" was a "really big mace" for a long time.

It seems my brother figured that since a druid could use a scimitar and a druid was a cleric sub-class, well, that a scimitar must be some kind of bashing weapon.

Yeah, guess the dictionary didn't get much use in our house.
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serleran · Post by **serleran** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:08 pm

I thought, when I first read it, oh so many years ago that disintegrate turned you into constituent parts. That is, if you were struck by it, your arms, head, and legs would fall off. That was actually more fun than being turned into ash.
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Secret Skeleton · Post by **Secret Skeleton** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:21 pm

Reading the book Deities & Demigods was essentially the final nail in the coffin of practicing religion for me. After seeing all of that on paper I realized how ridiculous religion seemed.

I say "final" nail because all the other nails were made up of insane parenting and a nun ripping up my copy of The Book of Three for being Satanic.

Post by **Fiffergrund** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:30 pm

serleran wrote:
I thought, when I first read it, oh so many years ago that disintegrate turned you into constituent parts. That is, if you were struck by it, your arms, head, and legs would fall off. That was actually more fun than being turned into ash.

That is a sweet visual, sir.

I remembered another one. Phantasmal Force, to me, always created an angry giant ape. Bonus XP to anyone who knows why.
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Treebore · Post by **Treebore** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:39 pm

Secret Skeleton wrote:
Reading the book Deities & Demigods was essentially the final nail in the coffin of practicing religion for me. After seeing all of that on paper I realized how ridiculous religion seemed.

I say "final" nail because all the other nails were made up of insane parenting and a nun ripping up my copy of The Book of Three for being Satanic.

Yeah, I don't practice "practicing religions" either, but I am very religious. IE God. Whatever s/he/it truly is.

My memory is too far gone for me to remember any misconceptions I used to have.
I like to just think I was always right!
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Omote · Post by **Omote** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 8:45 pm

Fiffergrund wrote:
I remembered another one. Phantasmal Force, to me, always created an angry giant ape. Bonus XP to anyone who knows why.

I believe it was a Jeff Easley picture from Basic D&D that showed a wizard casting Phantasmal Force (or this picture was just near the spell description) in which the spell depicted a 'wave" of 3 giant apes springing forth from the caster's fingers.

~O
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Hrolfgar · Post by **Hrolfgar** » Mon Feb 08, 2010 11:40 pm

serleran wrote:
I thought, when I first read it, oh so many years ago that disintegrate turned you into constituent parts. That is, if you were struck by it, your arms, head, and legs would fall off. That was actually more fun than being turned into ash.

That is more cool, I always visualizred distengrate being like a Star Trek phaser.

Post by **Fiffergrund** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 2:07 am

Hrolfgar wrote:
That is more cool, I always visualizred distengrate being like a Star Trek phaser.

Good one. I always pictured it as the effect after Wile E. Coyote blows himself up. *poof* *crumble*
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Post by **Fiffergrund** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 2:07 am

Omote wrote:
I believe it was a Jeff Easley picture from Basic D&D that showed a wizard casting Phantasmal Force (or this picture was just near the spell description) in which the spell depicted a 'wave" of 3 giant apes springing forth from the caster's fingers.

~O

Bonus XP.
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Omote · Post by **Omote** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 3:11 am

YAY! One day I will get to 2nd level.

~O
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Post by **Fiffergrund** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 7:22 pm

Omote wrote:
YAY! One day I will get to 2nd level.

~O

Pace yourself. 3rd is the highest.
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Julian Grimm · Post by **Julian Grimm** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 7:44 pm

Treebore wrote:
Yeah, I don't practice "practicing religions" either, but I am very religious. IE God. Whatever s/he/it truly is.

My memory is too far gone for me to remember any misconceptions I used to have.
I like to just think I was always right!

I am pretty comfortable where I am at with my faith. That said, I have a very different view of God and don't slight others for their views.
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Drew · Post by **Drew** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 8:23 pm

I used to pronounce mage as if it rhymed with badge. That's how my cousin pronounced it and I picked it up from him. Like the OP, I thought a lucerne hammer was, in fact, a big hammer. I'm sure there are more.

ThrorII · Post by **ThrorII** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 8:24 pm

I always confused maces and flails. I thought a mace was a flail, and didn't know what a flail was.

I could never figure out what 'splint mail' and 'banded mail' were.

I always pictured 'magic missile' as an arcane ICBM launching from behind the magic-user and striking the target. Yes, I was a child of the 70's-80's.

Post by **Fiffergrund** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 9:26 pm

ThrorII wrote:
I always pictured 'magic missile' as an arcane ICBM launching from behind the magic-user and striking the target. Yes, I was a child of the 70's-80's.

Full of win.
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jaybird216 · Post by **jaybird216** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 11:00 pm

I played with a 35-year-old guy last year who thought a lucern hammer was a bashing instrument. He played it off when we all told him it was a pole arm.

As far as idiocy way back when: The most glaring error is that we had no idea how to read a d4. For several months, we'd roll it, pick it up, and then sum the numerals on the bottom face. A dagger wasn't so bad, then
A friend of mine would pronounce "chaos" as if it rhymed with "house" - CHOUSE!

I guess that's about it, aside from the ubiquitous multi-million gp fortresses we'd each amass by 9th level. Ah, to be a kid again.
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Taranthyll · Post by **Taranthyll** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 11:40 pm

I had no idea that "open hand attacks" referred to martial arts, nor did I realize that the monk class was based on the Shaolin variety. As a consequence I had a mental image of Friar Tuck bitch-slapping foes into submission.
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Taranthyll · Post by **Taranthyll** » Tue Feb 09, 2010 11:43 pm

jaybird216 wrote:
A friend of mine would pronounce "chaos" as if it rhymed with "house" - CHOUSE!

A friend of mine thought that ogre was pronounced "org." He kept going on about how he wanted Gauntlets of "Org" Power, and I had no idea what he was talking about.
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paladin2019 · Post by **paladin2019** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 3:48 am

Taranthyll wrote:
I had no idea that "open hand attacks" referred to martial arts, nor did I realize that the monk class was based on the Shaolin variety. As a consequence I had a mental image of Friar Tuck bitch-slapping foes into submission.

That is an awesome image.

Frost · Post by **Frost** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 2:08 pm

Taranthyll wrote:
I had no idea that "open hand attacks" referred to martial arts, nor did I realize that the monk class was based on the Shaolin variety. As a consequence I had a mental image of Friar Tuck bitch-slapping foes into submission.

Yep, I was right there with you. I used to picture Friar Tuck beating the crap out of people.
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Drew · Post by **Drew** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 7:03 pm

My cousin also said "org" instead of ogre. Really sharp guy, too, just couldn't hack D&D pronunciations. Also, the Friar Tuck thing is funny.

Post by **Fiffergrund** » Wed Feb 10, 2010 11:54 pm

New colloquialism: I'm gonna go all Friar Tuck on yo' ass.
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jaybird216 · Post by **jaybird216** » Thu Feb 11, 2010 3:07 am

I'ma Tuck you up, foo'!
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Sir Ironside · Post by **Sir Ironside** » Thu Feb 11, 2010 3:21 am

For the longest time I pronounced melee as it was written and not maylay as it is pronounced. Even scoffed at people who were saying it right.

I thought elves only came in one variety. It wasn't till later that I discovered the tall and graceful variety, now they are my favourite type of elf.
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capitalbill · Post by **capitalbill** » Thu Feb 11, 2010 3:26 am

Sir Ironside wrote:
For the longest time I pronounced melee as it was written and not maylay as it is pronounced. Even scoffed at people who were saying it right.

I thought elves only came in one variety. It wasn't till later that I discovered the tall and graceful variety, now they are my favourite type of elf.

+1 on the "me-lee" versus "may-lay"
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Traveller · Post by **Traveller** » Thu Feb 11, 2010 3:37 am

Taranthyll wrote:
I had no idea that "open hand attacks" referred to martial arts, nor did I realize that the monk class was based on the Shaolin variety. As a consequence I had a mental image of Friar Tuck bitch-slapping foes into submission.

You mean like this?
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Taranthyll · Post by **Taranthyll** » Thu Feb 11, 2010 9:53 pm

Traveller wrote:
You mean like this?

Ha Ha! That's great!

And this
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